Grace has a lot of different definitions. Over the last five years I’ve come to use grace as a noun in a particular way that Webster defines as “goodwill” or a “favor”. I have found that it is incredibly powerful to give grace to others. Good leaders give grace to others much more than they expect grace from others.

In a simple way, this happens every day. I can get frustrated when folks don’t do what they’ve committed to do. Deliver a report. Update me on status. Attend a meeting (on time or at all). These things are not big things - not make or break things in the grand scheme of things. My natural behavior lends me to quickly becoming frustrated at these little things. And I have to remind myself to give the other person grace.

I find sometimes it is easier to suggest to others that they give grace. I often can be quick to judge, and I need to slow down. I can think of myself as a close friend and suggest to that friend that perhaps I need to give grace in this situation. Rather than jump to judgment or become upset.

I remind myself that I know next to nothing about what that person is dealing with and why they are late, absent or unable to update me on status. There are things in this world out of our control. There are priorities like family that are much more important. I remind myself that whatever reason I can give that person grace and let go of whatever transgression I’ve built up in my head. It’s a wonderful give to give others grace.

There are times when I need grace. There are times when a flights is delayed and I’m unable to make a meeting. When my family needs me and I’m there instead of at work. When my phone dies and I simply cannot update someone on the status or attend a meeting even by phone. And these are times when I need grace from others. I need the grace to not have my transgression held over me.

It is in these ties of needing grace that I welcome the balance that I have given so many others grace. When I am in a hard situation, unable to meet the expectations of my colleague I can say to myself “I need grace.” And I know I have given grace to the world in a way that complements my own need for grace.

It’s important for me to give grace as often as I can, and to ask for grace as rarely as possible. It feels like a karmic balance that I can exist in the world giving more grace than I ask for from others. And I feel like that can put more positive energy in the world. We will always need grace from others (often when we least expect it) and giving grace freely can help lend balance to the flow.